- Master of Time
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Hello and welcome, lads and lasses, to Bring a Brain, your favourite comedy/watchdog series! Today, we'll look at yet another round of the usual stuff... Without further ado... Cry "Havoc!," and let slip the dogs of war!
As always, we'll start with rounding up the Usual Suspects.
First, this Zenith Victorious:
What you should know, but Hodinkee won't tell you: the upper left lug is bent. Besides, just look at how the lugs interact with the strap - the lower lugs have the strap loose between them, the upper part of the strap has the upper left lug chew right into the band...
The dial is also a wee bit unsettling. First of all, that's not a Zenith font I've seen on any Victorious. Second, it seems oddly fat, and shrinks from left to right... All the applied features seem to have a rather odd effect around them.
Then, let's look at this Crumpet...Crouton...no, Croton:
Their assessment of condition as "very good" is pretty far from the truth, especially when you look at the movement:
There's rust on the clutch, and all the wheels have a dulled surface with visible stains. This hasn't been serviced for a LONG time. Filth and debris on plates as well. The pushers are a repository of all manner of filth.
Oh, and did someone try to open the back with a compass or a chisel?
Now, this gold Rolex:
Hmmm... "Minor darkening on the center of the dial?" These, dear H-Boyos, are radium burns. Not like they don't notice them, only it doesn't appear like they know what these are.
Now, this UG pocket watch:
Why, that's a very long and laborious ode to what's simply a run-of-the-mill 1960s PW powered by an ordinary wristwatch movement.
Let's have a look at the column to which BaB owes its name...
...and one listing they've hyped:
It's not about what's there, as much as it's about what isn't there, and what happens not to be there, is a movement picture. Swell.
Let us move on to another venue - the Knowers of Nothing. Lads and lasses, T&H.
...with an uber-coveted Disintegrating Dial. Yeah, well, if anything can be said of it, it's that it's falling apart. This mangled FUBAR dial can be yours for 1915 USD.
Another Omega, this time a Geneve Dynamic:
"Patina throughout." Ummm, no, that's not patina.
It's time for another dealer, which I believe is really up for being a regular feature at BaB, as I've said in the previous instalment. Lads and lasses, Wannabuyawatch!
Anyone up for paying 13.5 grand for a redialed Patek?
Dial repainted by Orangutan Restorations Limited. The cost of such a repaint must be absolutely bananas.
Or, maybe this "beautifully restored" VC?
The dial is a complete and utter redial, hands relumed, dial lume missing...
Hmmm, no...so how about $1600 for this run-of-the-mill, gold plated quartz?
See, it's not that I don't wanna buy a watch. I just don't want that garbage, and not from you.
That's all for this instalment of Bring a Brain. Take care, and Bring a Brain will return if necessary!
Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Star Trek: The Next Generation