- MKTheVintageBloke (Online)
- Master of Time
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Welcome, lads and lasses, to Bring a Brain! Today's edition marks something of a breakthrough - that is because a major victory has been achieved, or at least the vintage watch collectors' community can feel some relief after an unbelievable spot of luck. But we'll get to that later. Lads and lasses, this is your Bring a Brain!
First, we shall focus on some offers from the Shop.
First up for a critical look, this Omega:
No lume on the dial, lumed hands, and on top of that - these lumed hands are obviously of a different shade of gold. How much room does that leave for uncertainty? None, dear Donkeys, none.
Next, another Omega:
When you finally get something more or less right, but not the price... $4900? Not by a bloody long shot is that right.
"Explorer-style dial." How about no? First of all, I've yet to see a sub-second Explorer. Second, an Explorer doesn't have a numeral at 12. Of course, the price is above the top end of the range for the regular Ranchero (there were also military issued ones, which sell for way more). I wonder why is that so, if the watch has not even been serviced, and the movement is in a rather poor condition?
Now, something from the non-Shop content:
Hmmm, a frankenwatch without any papers to prove the provenance... No. Just, no. I'm very glad, that my comments about the Heuer Calculator "revenge listing" have made it to them, and they did take them into account. A proper caveat is there, which is great. But there are some issues, which need to be addressed. First of all, a movement incorrect for the case can't be excused by something like "one often sees watches used by professionals, with swapped movements, re-lumed dials, and other service upgrades." Swapped movement parts - happens. Factory relumes- happens. But swapping out an entire movement? Sorry, but no, that doesn't convince me. Not in the bloody slightest. Without any papers to prove the provenance, the Sealab engraving is worth naught - I could well have a random watch engraved, and say it belonged to Humphrey bloody Bogart, which doesn't make it so. Evidence, evidence, evidence, no evidence, no provenance, fare thee bloody well and good riddance to the big-time claims.
Now, this piece, by Sauron himself, preaching from the heart of Mordor:
First of all, no, I don't need to follow them. And I won't.
"There is lots (and lots) of horological buffonery to see on IG." It's buffoonery, not buffonery. Oh, by the way, who promotes that buffoonery all the time? Food for thought.
"These guys are next level." Ummm, next level of what? Spending? Wallet thickness? Oh, yes, quite on the contrary to what he wrote in his rancid editorial about "mistakes" some time ago, he does appear to believe that price = bragging rights. Also, fondness of Rolex and spending millions of them doesn't make one "next level." It only makes them someone who spends the GDP of some forgotten tropical nation on Daytonas.
Lads and lasses, I have left the best for last, for which I'm sorry, but I just wanted to give you your long-awaited, regular Bring a Brain, before getting to this. Some of you already know that, and this communique is for all who don't know it yet...
I am pleased to announce, that Louis Westphalen, the author of Bring a Loupe (to which BaB owes its title), Donkeys' Hype Specialist and the culprit behind all the Shop's fails, which were so much fun to write about, is now out of Hoodwinkee. Karma, or justice?
The story is truly fascinating, if I may say so. Only something like a week after the Aqua-Lung frankenwatch having been sold at the Shop, Bring a Loupe went quiet. On last week's Friday Live video, Jack Forster has announced, that Louis "is no longer with Hodinkee", as he went to pursue "a big professional opportunity in Europe" and to "spend more time with his family", as well as "he left on the best possible terms."
Nice try, Pinocchio. All that Mr. Forster lacked, was his nose growing so much as to hit the camera in the lens.
First of all, the Hoodwinkee staff in these videos appears to act naturally in front of the camera, including Mr. Forster. And so he did on this video...save for when he was making that announcement. Rapid blinking. Lack of confidence in the voice. Nervously looking at his co-presenters, as if for a confirmation of his words. By Jove, dear Donkeys, if you want to at least pretend to be as much as good liars - why, you're good at pretending, so maybe you just can pull that off, as the time to pretend to be experts and a trustworthy news outlet is over - do that in your writing, because on video it's not going to work. I'm no detective, but if that stuff can't escape the attention of an average person, there's just no way it can be convincing.
Second, you don't say something like "left on best possible terms", if someone leaves of their own accord. That's corporate newspeak, which is used when someone is, ummm...asked to resign. Heard enough of that newspeak to be able to identify it when I hear it. It's just a part of the standard set of excuses, some parts of which set were used in that announcement.
Also, when a key figure leaves, someone who was there for a long time, and who was responsible for a lot - a lot - of the site's content, just going silent without even a "goodbye" article, that's peculiar, to say the least. There's a word for that, and it's called "suspicious."
Fare thee well, Louis. If you're out of fleecing, and back into collecting, maybe now you'll experience that mayhem you've made in the market. Hope you do, and hope it'll be a lesson. Call it the ethic of reciprocity in practice.
In the meantime, every week without the usual Friday fest of hype is a week of peace for the market, and a week of peace for us, the collectors. This week, there have been no new arrivals at the Shop, so the Fleecer's Den is temporarily out of order, it seems. Which is good. Now, if anyone has doubts, that an initiative like Bring a Brain can't make a change, I believe it's time to rethink your views on that. Yes, it can. Veritas vincit. We did it, lads and lasses. For now, maybe for a week, maybe for a month, but still.
Of course, Forster's statement did have a mention of Hoodwinkee intending to continue Bring a Loupe, upon finding a new vintage watch specialist. Should the new person in charge of that be more competent, there will be less Bring a Brain threads published. But to Jove and to all of you I promise, that if it'll be any worse, if the hype will be more dreadful than ever, and the Shop will sell even more redials, frankens and rustbuckets, Bring a Brain will be necessary, it will be there, and it will give them no quarter.
But for now, it's time to celebrate. If I may use a scriptural metaphor, the horn of Moab is cut off, and his arm is broken.
Bring a Brain will return if necessary!
Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Star Trek: The Next Generation