Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Dive W

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Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Dive W

Post by koimaster » January 31st 2018, 5:12pm

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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by conjurer » January 31st 2018, 6:24pm

Holy shit! Some C-C-Claro triple eights fell off the back of a truck!!*

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*C-C-Claro gag ©2017 Codguy Quips and Laff Riot Partners, Ltd.
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by TemerityB » January 31st 2018, 9:33pm

Holy shit. First Claros I've seen in ages. And that dial work is so cheesy I bet the watches smell like provolone. BTW, SO is selling this on Amazon, too, and the hype of the product page comes right out an states it's packing the Claros. Stuhrling Prestige, Daddy! Looks like a parts bin special from stem to stern.

Congrats to Larry Magen and Stuhrling Original; as Howard Cosell once told Oscar Madison: "You don't care how low you stoop."
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by conjurer » January 31st 2018, 11:07pm

TemerityB wrote:Holy shit. First Claros I've seen in ages. And that dial work is so cheesy I bet the watches smell like provolone. BTW, SO is selling this on Amazon, too, and the hype of the product page comes right out an states it's packing the Claros. Stuhrling Prestige, Daddy! Looks like a parts bin special from stem to stern.

Congrats to Larry Magen and Stuhrling Original; as Howard Cosell once told Oscar Madison: "You don't care how low you stoop."


Interestingly, I googled "swiss claro 888 automatic movement" and it took me to the Claro website, viz: http://www.clarowatch.com/movements.html.

Some years ago, when the C-C-Claro movements were something of a thing, I checked out their website. Back then, about ten (!) years ago, the site seemed dead; none of the links worked, and it seemed frozen in time, like those Pompeiians who got fucked over by Mt. Vesuvius. Now, however, some of the links seem to work, and you can go here:

https://www.boutiquevonburg.com/watches/gender/men/

Which shows a bunch of shit with the Claro label, along with--wait for it--shit from AVI-8, one of the Urine bullshit brands, along with Ferragamo, yet another of Urine's bullshit brands, this one repped by the Mephistophelean Stephen Jay, who is the Gevril rep, as well as being one of the greasiest motherfuckers from the Florida Wartche Triangle.

But, there's more! Wait around for a couple of minutes, for more choices to load, and what the fuck do we find? Sturhling Original! Allow more to load, like Jomashop only with more grease, and what do we find? Versace! Named after the fruit who got whacked by serial murderer Andrew Cunanan, and repped by--who else? the Mephistophelean Stephen Jay, on Urine live.
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by JAS1125 » February 1st 2018, 7:26am

TemerityB wrote:Holy shit. First Claros I've seen in ages. And that dial work is so cheesy I bet the watches smell like provolone. BTW, SO is selling this on Amazon, too, and the hype of the product page comes right out an states it's packing the Claros. Stuhrling Prestige, Daddy! Looks like a parts bin special from stem to stern.

Congrats to Larry Magen and Stuhrling Original; as Howard Cosell once told Oscar Madison: "You don't care how low you stoop."


TMMLH :mrgreen:

https://www.amazon.com/Automatic-Stainl ... epthmaster
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by TemerityB » February 1st 2018, 8:29am

conjurer wrote:
TemerityB wrote:Holy shit. First Claros I've seen in ages. And that dial work is so cheesy I bet the watches smell like provolone. BTW, SO is selling this on Amazon, too, and the hype of the product page comes right out an states it's packing the Claros. Stuhrling Prestige, Daddy! Looks like a parts bin special from stem to stern.

Congrats to Larry Magen and Stuhrling Original; as Howard Cosell once told Oscar Madison: "You don't care how low you stoop."


Interestingly, I googled "swiss claro 888 automatic movement" and it took me to the Claro website, viz: http://www.clarowatch.com/movements.html.

Some years ago, when the C-C-Claro movements were something of a thing, I checked out their website. Back then, about ten (!) years ago, the site seemed dead; none of the links worked, and it seemed frozen in time, like those Pompeiians who got fucked over by Mt. Vesuvius. Now, however, some of the links seem to work, and you can go here:

https://www.boutiquevonburg.com/watches/gender/men/

Which shows a bunch of shit with the Claro label, along with--wait for it--shit from AVI-8, one of the Urine bullshit brands, along with Ferragamo, yet another of Urine's bullshit brands, this one repped by the Mephistophelean Stephen Jay, who is the Gevril rep, as well as being one of the greasiest motherfuckers from the Florida Wartche Triangle.

But, there's more! Wait around for a couple of minutes, for more choices to load, and what the fuck do we find? Sturhling Original! Allow more to load, like Jomashop only with more grease, and what do we find? Versace! Named after the fruit who got whacked by serial murderer Andrew Cunanan, and repped by--who else? the Mephistophelean Stephen Jay, on Urine live.


That Claro site has a 2017 date on it - so, apparently, somehow, Claro is still alive. Last I heard they were belly-up. Then again, since I wouldn't touch a Claro even if I was wearing Versace gloves, I'm kinda slow in keeping up with "industry trends." Could the good folks at SO/Von Berg have revived Claro so they can stamp "Swiss" on their crud?
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by svaglic » February 1st 2018, 12:08pm

At least I don't see Swiss Made on the dial and the back has Swiss Movt. They are learning.
They claim Swiss Made in advertising, but are smart enough not to put it on the dial.
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by koimaster » February 1st 2018, 12:37pm

svaglic wrote:At least I don't see Swiss Made on the dial and the back has Swiss Movt. They are learning.
They claim Swiss Made in advertising, but are smart enough not to put it on the dial.



They claim it is their first "swiss automatic movement" watch but as you say, not swiss made.
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by TemerityB » February 1st 2018, 4:19pm

Hey - did anyone notice on the bottom of those barely functioning Von Burg sites...
Image
...so they is all in the same bed now?

Also..click on "Our Brands" at the ridiculous

https://www.boutiquevonburg.com

site that offers "Von Burg" "top" brands such as SO and Versce and AVI-8 and Swiss Mountaineer (?) and such, and I noticed there's a full page of ...

Image

Now, wait a minute ... a site that says Von Berg at the top and Claro at the bottom has, somewhat hidden on the site, 39 Omega models at discounted prices? Are they an AD? No, don't think so...I mean, could they be....well, I don't wanna even suggest that ...would the people who brought us the Sthurling Original Ricochet actually... would they...naahh, couldn't be, we saw them on the TV...but would they?

It's been a while since I've written a watch company a letter, but my trigger finger's a bit itchy.
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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by conjurer » February 1st 2018, 5:02pm

TemerityB wrote:Hey - did anyone notice on the bottom of those barely functioning Von Burg sites...
Image
...so they is all in the same bed now?

Also..click on "Our Brands" at the ridiculous

https://www.boutiquevonburg.com

site that offers "Von Burg" "top" brands such as SO and Versce and AVI-8 and Swiss Mountaineer (?) and such, and I noticed there's a full page of ...

Image

Now, wait a minute ... a site that says Von Berg at the top and Claro at the bottom has, somewhat hidden on the site, 39 Omega models at discounted prices? Are they an AD? No, don't think so...I mean, could they be....well, I don't wanna even suggest that ...would the people who brought us the Sthurling Original Ricochet actually... would they...naahh, couldn't be, we saw them on the TV...but would they?

It's been a while since I've written a watch company a letter, but my trigger finger's a bit itchy.


Who the hell can say? With these lowlifes, it's six of one, a half dozen of another. With the Omegas, I'd suppose that they fell off the back of a truck as well. You go down the rabbit hole with these jagoffs, it's impossible to tell what you're gonna find.
I find tv watches to be like the guys who raise their truck you need a fricken ladder to get in. It’s a attempt to look cool... that’s all.

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Re: Meet the Depthmaster, Our First Ever Swiss Automatic Div

Post by TemerityB » February 1st 2018, 5:50pm

conjurer wrote:Who the hell can say? With these lowlifes, it's six of one, a half dozen of another. With the Omegas, I'd suppose that they fell off the back of a truck as well. You go down the rabbit hole with these jagoffs, it's impossible to tell what you're gonna find.


Well... let's just say I wasn't Inferring that they fell off the back of a truck. Think Ricochet... :wink:
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