You are right about dive watches and women. They avoid them like they avoid men with gold chains and too much chest hair.
What women really like is for a man to be slathered in a truly masculine scent.
Like Sex Panther. Made with bits of real panther so you know it works.
Experts say that it smells like:
Pure gasoline (Ron Burgundy)
A used diaper with indian food (Veronica Corningstone)
A turd covered in burnt hair
The smell of desire
if Kim Kardashian went to a Indian restaurant, ordered the spiciest food and shit in your nostrils