Watchlords

Jonah Hill? Pauly Shore!

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:15am

Jonah Hill? Pauly Shore!

Why not say Gilbert Godfrey?

I really don't think you guys understand James Bond. Especially, Conjurer. James Bond was not a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that). He was every man's manly man. Look up man in the dictionary. That's right there is James Bond's photo.

smellody wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:59am

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:15am

Jonah Hill? Pauly Shore!

Why not say Gilbert Godfrey?

I really don't think you guys understand James Bond. Especially, Conjurer. James Bond was not a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that). He was every man's manly man. Look up man in the dictionary. That's right there is James Bond's photo.

Did you imagine I was serious? To be clear, James Bond is a man. Only James Bond carries the number 007 - no other agent. James Bond is a man - period. Further, call it what you will, in my estimation - a White man. That said, I understand from long observation here that Cmdr. Bond is a hero of yours, but he is not such a sacred cow that a little levity may not be had at his expense - thus the suggestions of Jonah Hill, Pauly Shore, Gilbert Godfrey, a lisping nancy-boy - or (if you recall) Peter Sellars.

If the above be true, whither the franchise in this day and age? I suppose we'll just have to wait and see what Mistress Broccoli decides on.

Edit: David Niven, not Peter Sellars, dammit!

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 10:17am

smellody wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:59am

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:15am

Jonah Hill? Pauly Shore!

Why not say Gilbert Godfrey?

I really don't think you guys understand James Bond. Especially, Conjurer. James Bond was not a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that). He was every man's manly man. Look up man in the dictionary. That's right there is James Bond's photo.

Did you imagine I was serious? To be clear, James Bond is a man. Only James Bond carries the number 007 - no other agent. James Bond is a man - period. Further, call it what you will, in my estimation - a White man. That said, I understand from long observation here that Cmdr. Bond is a hero of yours, but he is not such a sacred cow that a little levity may not be had at his expense - thus the suggestions of Jonah Hill, Pauly Shore, Gilbert Godfrey, a lisping nancy-boy - or (if you recall) Peter Sellars.

If the above be true, whither the franchise in this day and age? I suppose we'll just have to wait and see what Mistress Broccoli decides on.

I know you aren't serious. You'd have to be locked up otherwise.

Yes, JB is a hero. Also, I like gold, Rolex, Rolls Royce, Jaguars, and the ladies. Little has changed with me in the last fourty years.

At least I am consistent.

smellody wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:59am

I really don't think you guys understand James Bond. Especially, Conjurer. James Bond was not a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that). He was every man's manly man. Look up man in the dictionary. That's right there is James Bond's photo.

You seem to have concepts of sexuality, gender and masculinity muddled.

Bond himself wasn't as rigid about it as you appear to be. In Skyfall the villan tries to unsettle Bond by flirting with him and laughs that Bond's training hadn't prepared him for it. Bond was unfazed and replies “What makes you think this is my first time?”.

I'm not making any particular claim one way or another, but you can't discount what is in the book/film canon. This is a case of Bond appearing to be open to bisexuality.

Bisexuality? The fuck are you talking about, Carl?! James Bond laid so much cable on other guys his middle name should be Comcast! Not only that, but Ian Fleming blew Royal Marines for nickels and gave back change. True fact.

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 10:17am

smellody wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:59am

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:15am

Jonah Hill? Pauly Shore!

Why not say Gilbert Godfrey?

I really don't think you guys understand James Bond. Especially, Conjurer. James Bond was not a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that). He was every man's manly man. Look up man in the dictionary. That's right there is James Bond's photo.

Did you imagine I was serious? To be clear, James Bond is a man. Only James Bond carries the number 007 - no other agent. James Bond is a man - period. Further, call it what you will, in my estimation - a White man. That said, I understand from long observation here that Cmdr. Bond is a hero of yours, but he is not such a sacred cow that a little levity may not be had at his expense - thus the suggestions of Jonah Hill, Pauly Shore, Gilbert Godfrey, a lisping nancy-boy - or (if you recall) Peter Sellars.

If the above be true, whither the franchise in this day and age? I suppose we'll just have to wait and see what Mistress Broccoli decides on.

A Jane Bond is unthinkable. This would be infamnia. I disagree with the "white man" thing, however. I think a butch Indian (Asian) Bond would be OK. And, I'm not sari about saying this.

conjurer wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 10:47pm

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 10:17am

smellody wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:59am

Falstaff wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 8:15am

Jonah Hill? Pauly Shore!

Why not say Gilbert Godfrey?

I really don't think you guys understand James Bond. Especially, Conjurer. James Bond was not a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that). He was every man's manly man. Look up man in the dictionary. That's right there is James Bond's photo.

Did you imagine I was serious? To be clear, James Bond is a man. Only James Bond carries the number 007 - no other agent. James Bond is a man - period. Further, call it what you will, in my estimation - a White man. That said, I understand from long observation here that Cmdr. Bond is a hero of yours, but he is not such a sacred cow that a little levity may not be had at his expense - thus the suggestions of Jonah Hill, Pauly Shore, Gilbert Godfrey, a lisping nancy-boy - or (if you recall) Peter Sellars.

If the above be true, whither the franchise in this day and age? I suppose we'll just have to wait and see what Mistress Broccoli decides on.

A Jane Bond is unthinkable. This would be infamnia. I disagree with the "white man" thing, however. I think a butch Indian (Asian) Bond would be OK. And, I'm not sari about saying this.

The "White man" thing just reflects my own picture of Bond. I can't imagine a Black man or a heathen Chinee engaging my interest in the same way. It is not as if some fellow of different ethnicity couldn't portray a perfectly adequate Bond - and possibly open up whole new vistas for the character. After all, the Bond persona has been stretched to fit no less than 8 very different actors. By the bye, Lazenby was much better than he has ever been credited for. As to your jab about not being "sari" - I always enjoy a good Pun-jab.

An article discussing the direction of the Bond movies in the Guardian today:
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2021/s ... ce-to-kill

.

^^^^^

Yet another Bond movie I can't wait to not watch. That makes what, about three dozen now?

Mark1 wrote: ↑

September 23rd 2021, 7:13pm

How about a non binary lead character not a one or a zero.

How about fluid throughout the movie? Starts as a guy, half-way through gets an op, identifies as a tree and finishes off as the actual bad guy all along.

conjurer wrote: ↑

September 24th 2021, 10:47pm

A Jane Bond is unthinkable. This would be infamnia. I disagree with the "white man" thing, however. I think a butch Indian (Asian) Bond would be OK. And, I'm not sari about saying this.

I - heh - Sikh what you did there ;)

Jane Bond would be Jane Bond, not James Bond. A different character, and nothing to do with Ian Fleming. No problem at all - just don't try and shit us that it is, because it isn't.

bedlam wrote: ↑

September 25th 2021, 9:38pm

An article discussing the direction of the Bond movies in the Guardian today:
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2021/s ... ce-to-kill

More po-faced nonsense from the Marxist movement's in-flight magazine.

However the underlying sentiment that James Bond should no longer be saving the world does have some merit. The world is beyond saving, and even if it wasn't, doesn't deserve it.

Just hire Kate Beckinsale, stick her in an Aston Martin and a shape-shifting Omega that turns into a Rolex from time to time.

The villain can be a Javovitch derivative virus that turns people into werewolves.

Hawk wrote: ↑

September 27th 2021, 9:12am

Just hire Kate Beckinsale, stick her in an Aston Martin and a shape-shifting Omega that turns into a Rolex from time to time.

The villain can be a Javovitch derivative virus that turns people into werewolves.

Or just retire Bond and go the post Jack Ryan, posthumous Clancy route - "007's Secret Service Files" and use any character whether male, female, Black, heathen Oriental, gay, trans or handicapped as the lead and keep the money machine rolling.

FINE it is fine. I have all the James Bond movies (which he not portrayed as a gay (not that there is anything wrong with that)) on blue ray. I have a blue ray player so I can watch them for thr rest of my life.

I'll watch the new movie that I've been waiting two years to be released.

I can just retire it in my head. Like so many other goods things that have come to end. For example, Jaguar; they are all electric and I am now done with them. Saxophones . I have 20 or so of them in the garage. I lost all interest when creepy Clinton was playing Saxophone on stage.

I can move on.

Done.

It is a high risk occupation. As such they could avoid the angst and controversy by employing the same device as “Kate”, “Old Guard” and “One Night in Bangkok”: just kill off the main character and use the next MI6 cannon fodder in the sequels.

“Cabin in the Woods” would be a suitable franchise-ending gambit wherein the efforts to save the world go pear shaped and *everybody” dies.

Screw this fixation on continuity.

Continuity and a predictable outcome are what make James Bond, well . . . James Bond.

I guess I'd add something else I like. TRADITION

Continuity is all well and good but it requires that each and every super genius Bond villain be dumber than Tuco in a spaghetti western.

“If you’re going to shoot, shoot. Don’t talk”
—Tuco

The irrational need to keep Bond alive to observe his distress or kill him in lengthy, Rube Goldbergish fashion has been the undoing of dozens of Bond villains.

My ability to reconcile evil genius with dumb as a rock elimination of one individual after breezily offing thousands perhaps is finite.

But I concede I’m not consistent: I haven’t yet tired of Wile E. Coyote falling vast distances after losing another one to the Road Runner.

smellody wrote: ↑

September 27th 2021, 10:12am

Continuity and a predictable outcome are what make James Bond, well . . . James Bond.

I guess I'd add something else I like. TRADITION

Tradition is important - with that in mind and as a purist myself, Bond ended with the last of Fleming's books, "The Man with the Golden Gun". "Octopussy and the Living Daylights", published posthumously, was dreadful and doesn't really count.

Hawk wrote: ↑

September 27th 2021, 10:36am

Continuity is all well and good but it requires that each and every super genius Bond villain be dumber than Tuco in a spaghetti western.

“If you’re going to shoot, shoot. Don’t talk”
—Tuco

The irrational need to keep Bond alive to observe his distress or kill him in lengthy, Rube Goldbergish fashion has been the undoing of dozens of Bond villains.

My ability to reconcile evil genius with dumb as a rock elimination of one individual after breezily offing thousands perhaps is finite.

But I concede I’m not consistent: I haven’t yet tired of Wile E. Coyote falling vast distances after losing another one to the Road Runner.

You might want to rethink the Tuco remark. It was a philosophical observation. Unlike Auric Goldfinger's unfulfilled statement of his expectations, Tuco said that after gunning down a fellow who blathered on about having the drop on him while he was in the bath. Tuco was no slouch -

The many crimes of Tuco
Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez

Tuco “the Rat” Ramirez was a busy guy.

Property Crimes
armed robbery of citizens, state banks, and post offices
arson in a state prison
cattle rustling
counterfeiting and passing counterfeit money
crimes against places of high authority include burning down the courthouse and sheriff’s office in Sonora
extortion
highway robbery
horse thievery
illegal postal pick up
unlawfully drawing salary and living allowances from the Union Army
receiving stolen goods
robbery
robbing an unknown number of post offices
selling stolen goods
supplying Indians with firearms
theft of sacred objects
using marked cards and loaded dice
derailing a train in order to rob the passengers

Violent Crimes
murder
kidnapping
assaulting a Justice of the Peace
raping a virgin of the white race
statutory rape of a minor of the black race
intention of selling fugitive slaves

Crimes against civil order
bigamy
deserting his wife and children
hired himself out as guide on a wagon train, after receiving his payment in advance, he deserted the wagon train in the hunting grounds of the Sioux Indians
inciting prostitution
misrepresenting himself as a Mexican general
perjury
promoting prostitution

He was a pimp? I didn’t know that. One wonders where he found the time.

Still, as a philosophy it’s probably preferable to those displayed by Bond villains who were often portrayed as geniuses.

“Mr. Bond, I have in this sack 15,000 marbles. Each will complete a 15 kilometer transit of this marble run of my own creation. Each 100 marble lot will trigger a bucket with a single pirhana that will drop onto your lap.

Now if you’ll excuse me I and my minions will vacate the premises secure in the knowledge that you will be eaten, balls first, by fish”

All good fun and I admit to liking the last installment I saw featuring the Day of the Dead, a repainted RedBull aerobatic helicopter and a bunch of other good stuff - and that was just the lead into the opening credits.

I think that Carrot Top should be the next Bond.

I’m not sure what would be the greater heresy to a proper Bond fan: Carrot Top or killing off Daniel Craig to get there.

John D McDonald’s Travis McGee books have been a guilty pleasure of mine and they’re about as sexist as it’s possible to get. But I give them a pass on that because … wait for it … the zeitgeist.

Hawk wrote: ↑

September 27th 2021, 12:36pm

I’m not sure what would be the greater heresy to a proper Bond fan: Carrot Top or killing off Daniel Craig to get there.

John D McDonald’s Travis McGee books have been a guilty pleasure of mine and they’re about as sexist as it’s possible to get. But I give them a pass on that because … wait for it … the zeitgeist.

Zeitgeist! Zeitgeist!!