Telling Your Aunt She Looks Hot!

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koimaster
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Telling Your Aunt She Looks Hot!

Post by koimaster » September 25th 2020, 10:53am

Yeah, I held my nose while writing that headline, but I can’t deny it. Yes, yes, I know, of course, most Invicta watches are the stuff of immediate derision, and rightfully so. From the company’s preposterous tall tales on home shopping networks (“Russian Divers” or “Flame Fusion crystals,” anyone?), to doing the Swiss tap dance for about a decade, to watches that actually are 50, 55, 60, 65 fucking millimeters wide (sans crowns!), this company, which actually manufactures nothing but farms out their assembly work to countries and companies around the globe, remains the king of actual clown watches, style wise. If for any reason you truly believe a 63mm Inivicta Grand Arsenal somehow looks even remotely normal on your list, we think you have bigger problems than a complete lack of taste and self-awareness.




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Re: Telling Your Aunt She Looks Hot!

Post by boscoe » October 2nd 2020, 3:06pm

Ah, the old 8926.
If only Eel Liar had stuck with that.
But truth is sometimes I get nostalgic for my 78 mm Invicter Pizza-panereye.
Great timepiece originally created for Mussolini's armored battalions.
Got lots of attention from fashion-forward fashionistas!
Strippers thought I was loaded thanks to the 5 microns of gen-u-ine Swizz gold layering that gleamed more than Flavor Flav's grill.
Everyone at my local Chucky Cheeze knew I'd arrived when I swaggered into the joint with that manly bad boy strapped on my 5.5-inch wrist.
Sadly, those days are gone and Mr. Liar is no longer "the most feared name in the watch industry today." But at least he's still Yellow to the core.
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