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Now this is the model which, on release, had your pus-riddled, goggle-wearing internet types screaming "62MAS! 62MAS!" *fapfapfap* before drenching their keyboards in spunk then threatening to murder each other over mild differences in opinion. So here's a short summary of why this SBCSPX00551/1J1 RAM module is nothing like that old 60's automatic self-dater.
What's wrong with it?
It's big. Heavy. 14mm thick, near as dammit 43mm across and that's all bezel. The store owner was wearing a plain (and damn fine) Radiomir and this Seiko was bigger, heavier and harder. The original was 37mm.
It's under-specced and overweight. An old Breitling Superocean available used for the same money is smaller, lighter and has SEVEN AND A HALF TIMES the 200m WR of this beast. Like the Tooderblackbay, it's a Mercedes S-Class with a four-pot under the hood. All mouth.
It's difficult to wear. The caseback is bubble shaped, and if it doesn't sit properly on your wrist, or you have it on a NATO, it'll bobble about proud of the wrist, like the City boy ostentatiously fiddling with the buttons of his shiny Omeega on the Tube.
It's awkwardly proportioned. The watch is 43mm across and nearly 50mm top to bottom but the lug width is 20mm. It's out of whack. The original had a wide lug width relative to its width, like a DateJust, and that worked.
It's shiny. It had this chicken-katsu polished bit on the side, or whatever some marketer (I put that link in, it's not spam) has convinced is an only-in-Japan thing whereas you can find a cheap Certina quartz with the exact same feature but whatever. The original diver didn't have any of this agedashe-tofu nonsense.
The crown is unsigned. Wait, no, "sterile", like that's a feature. Balls. Apparently the original was unsigned and that ironic, because absolutely no other feature whatever bears resemblance to the original. Seiko was just being cheap.
It's very, very colourful. The original was totally grey; even the black version of this watch has a rainbow in its bezel. But see below.
Was any of it actually good?
My god, the colour. Boy, can Seiko do colour. The only colour I've seen like this was on a twenty grand Moser. The bezel is matt, gloss, metallic blue, aquamarine and black all at the same time. It has many, many colorwayZ ((c) Watchlords) all at once. I just don't know how they did this. Under the loupe they gave me, new worlds opened when I looked through it. IWC's Mark XVIII pretty-rent-boy blue isn't nearly as vivid. And the lume. I've never seen anything like it; the store owner pulled out a blacklight and alarms went off; his Radiomir couldn't compete. And I do like the general case shape, including the lug curves. They do look expensive.
Why didn't you buy it, you stupid bastard?
I wasn't drunk enough. And, the shop display model was on a NATO-style strap and looked gawky. But if I'd pushed down (and then "out", heh) a bit more sake, I could have blown it, just for that incredible bezel alone.
Anyway, hope you enjoyed the essay. Rant sort of thing.