Horse Feathers wrote:
^ Conjurer, I just want you to know that when I typed "My hand is still sore", I thought twice but knew you would make the most of it
I was NOT disappointed !!
Hope that wasn't too disturbing.
BTW - Here is that photo of the Invicta Sea Pickle being assembled
Interestingly (and not to be too disturbing) I took a monster shit today. Mrs. C had made her world-famous baked ziti last night and I partook of it pretty heavily, as well as self-medicating later on with plenty of Canadian whiskey.
This morning I was rumbling pretty awful, so I duck-walked to the toilet and was just able to get my ample cheeks onto the seat when the dukeys started flowing like molten lava. The pyroclastic flow of dung continued for several minutes, literally lifting me off the porcelain throne like my torso was some appalling-flabby Saturn V booster rocket. I actually started flushing before I left the toilet, as I didn't want to see the remains of the hooch and baked ziti.
Afterwards I used about half a roll of toilet paper to wipe my revolting butthole, and needed some baby-wipes to sooth my burning rectum. The smell was so terrible my cats were walking around coughing like they were trying to bring up hairballs. Naturally, such a massive oil-spill plugged up my fucking toilet; I needed to plunge my hands into the gravy up to the elbows to manually loosen the turds in the trap of my toilet, which was so nasty that I started to projectile vomit all over the bathroom, liberally spattering my Susan Boyle-getting-fisted-by-Bruno-Mars shower curtain.
Anyway, I hope this posting wasn't too disturbing.